Thursday, August 8, 2013

Disgust on the Train (don't read while eating or vice versa)

Disclaimer: If your stomach is weak, look away. This is gross.



I may have already told you this, but Nick and I had a huge "wtf-moment" on the train after we first moved here. We were still in awe about the beauty of public transportation. Enjoying the freedom of being able to get around without having a car - when our happiness was suddenly interrupted by someone next to us, who threw up right onto his feet.

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Ja. Nick and I just looked at each other and that guy looked out the window. As if nothing happened.
Then, he did it again. Which was nice in a disgustingly weird way, because I was wondering if it was something I imagined.
We continued to watch this man get up as the train approached the next stop. Thankfully, he stepped outside at the station - but not without emptying his stomach onto that thick see through plastic divider next to the door.

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I am sure you are familiar with the concept of not being able to un-see anything.
This drunk guy proved that anything in support of this is absolutely true.

Now, I can't lean onto those plastic walls by the door anymore. This is terrible, because I would always do that and look really cool pretending that I am just standing with no issues or struggles not to fall over.
My life isn't the same anymore.

Yesterday, we had a reception at my office. It was warm outside, everyone had a wonderful time, and it was just a beautiful day.
Then, my whole mood changed when I was on the way home.
Again, I was on a subway when it happened. Before, I thought that nothing could ever shock me like puky guy from a few weeks ago.

An old man got on the train. With a briefcase and a plastic bag full of empty beer bottles. As he was approaching the bench I was sitting on, the bag started leaking old beer all over the floor and some peoples' shoes. You already know that nothing good can ever come from a story that begins like this.

There was one seat left between me and a young man... Mr Beer-Bag tried to sit down, stumbled, and fell onto my neighbor. I felt horrible for him! Beer-Bag had probably been wearing his clothes for 2-10 months straight and he was obviously not sober, because he couldn't get up again and was just leaning on/ laying on that poor young man, while mumbling loudly, reeking of booze and worse.

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Everyone was just staring in shock at each other for a minute. The young man, Mr Beer-Bag, and me. Then, the unbelievable happened. The old man started peeing himself. It was like the worst slow motion movie. Then, he sat down, next to me (which caused me to jump up) and continued leaking onto the seat. I have no more words.

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Before, I was worried about holding on to those poles (yes, I am a germophobiac. Get over it. And yes, that word exists.).

Now, I can't lean or sit anymore on trains!

Luckily, nobody ever gets up for anyone on crutches, anyways, and I am just standing freely with my four legs - which has caused for continuous struggles with gravity or centrifugal force during every train ride. At least I haven't fallen or peed on anyone yet. So that's a success.


What's the worst thing that you have ever witnessed on the train or bus?


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